C is for Comfort
How do you seek comfort?
We all have our ways. Sometimes it’s family, friends, counselors. But when it’s down to us, when we are left to our own devices, everyone is unique in their way to cope.
My means of comfort have changed throughout the years. It used to be writing. It’s a shame how little I write now compared to when I was a teenager. I still write a lot, but now it’s more for enjoyment than comfort or emotional release.
I’ve put some thought to it, and I think now I’m down to two real forms of comfort.
For as long as I can remember, I have used music as a means of comfort. Music is emotional, and for every emotion I feel, there is an appropriate song that I can pull up on youtube to accompany it. However, I don’t like how important music has become in my life. I love music, but I don’t like that I love it. Slowly, it is becoming like writing where it is there more for recreation and enjoyment rather than comfort, but I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I do use particular songs as a way of easing difficult emotions. While I fully believe that turning to God is more beneficial in truly gaining peace of mind, the reason why I turn to music so often is because of the immediacy. In a second, I can play a song and forget about the world. Reading Qur’an or making dua involves faith, trust, and patience.
However, in recent years, I really have learned to turn to God for comfort. While the idea that God should be the one you turn to in a moment of need has been drilled into my head time and time again seemingly since the day I was born, I never really used Him as a means of comfort until I started college. That was about the time when I started to see Islam as a way of living and a construct of how the world runs rather than simply a set of rules to follow. I learned to see God not just as a supreme being, but as my God who was there to help me in life. He knows me better than anyone, and can help me in ways no human can, so He is often the one I turn to when I am in need. That experience that I blogged about on the last day of Ramadan this past summer, when I purposely chose Qur’an over music when I was having a mental crisis – and found that it actually worked – still stays with me. The fact that listening to Qur’an worked almost just as immediately as my favorite song would in easing my emotion has really changed my perspective on the whole concept of comfort and emotional dependency.
Like anyone, I am evolving. I am a work in progress. With every day that God allows me to wake up, I will try to more and more become fully dependent on Him before anything else.